Happy New Year!!

This reminds me of being a smartass in calculus at AU:

New Mars Volta!!

The new album will be be released 1/28, entitled The Bedlam in Goliath. The background on this one sounds even creepier than Frances the Mute (from wikipedia):

On a trip in Jerusalem, Rodriguez-Lopez purchased an archaic ouija-type talking board at a curio shop as a gift for Bixler-Zavala. They would return to their tour bus after shows to play with it during their 2006 tour with the Red Hot Chili Peppers, as it quickly became the band's post-show ritual. Dubbed "The Soothsayer", the board revealed stories, gave names and made demands, as the band was contacted by three different people who appeared in the form of one, whom was then referred to as "Goliath".

Midway through the recording sessions, Rodriguez-Lopez buried "The Soothsayer" as an attempt to undo the curse and halt the unforeseen tragedies, who ended the ordeal by swearing never to give away the whereabouts of its burial, and also asking the band not to speak of it again during the remainder of the album's production.


Needless to say, I am very excited.

Best of 2007?

NRO rates the top movies of 2007. I've only seen half of them, but wanted to see the rest. I agree with most of the list, except I would switch numbers 1 and 2. And No Country For Old Men was FANTASTIC. However, The Simpsons Movie is absent? Anyone have thoughts on that? Because I thought the movie was good. Also, There Will Be Blood is a 2007 release and has Daniel Day Lewis ever been in a bad movie? And his mustache looks pretty sweet in that movie.

For Kris, John Boorman's ridiculous ideas for LOTR

I had no idea that John Boorman ever wanted to make Lord of the Rings in the seventies, and that his failures to land the project eventually led to the animated versions, while he went on to make Excalibur. I found this digging around chatrooms looking for information on Zardoz (directed by Boorman), which I now desperately want to see. This picture of Sean Connery should help you understand why. Has anyone seen Zardoz? Remember anything about it?

Anyway, here's the long entry on what Boorman's ridiculous LoTR might have been like, from an interview with one of Boorman's chief collaborators:

The adaption is also highly creative and inventive (ideas which Pallenberg still hopes to use in some other epic project). The history of Middle-earth is told in an interesting way, although the writer would do it differently today. "I devised kind of a Kabuki play in which the story of Sauron and the creation of the rings was explained to a gathering in Rivendell. [Reading the script] 'A play has begun. The stage is the table (a huge round table). The acting is stylized, emphatic. As in Kabuki Theater, the costumes are flamboyant, and symbolize beings and entities of Middle-earth.' In other words, with this device, we tried to simplify the backstory. But I think if I were to revisit the scene now, I would think of a faster way of doing it."

New material for the dwarf Gimli came from Pallenberg's fondness for the character. "I remember liking him a lot. I knew quite a bit about Wagner's operas and the German literature. I was sympathetic to him, and I tried to work him in wherever I could. I believe it was I who came up with idea where they bury Gimli in a hole, throw a cape on him, and beat him up to utter exhaustion to retrieve his unconscious ancestral memory." This ancient knowlege allows Gimli to know the word for entering Moria, and to find insights about the ancient dwarf kingdom.

Pallenberg contributed another original idea to the Moria sequence. "I had a rather fanciful idea involving these orcs that are slumbering or in some kind of narcotic state. The fellowship runs over them, and the footsteps start up their hearts. John liked that a lot."

He mentioned another change. "There's a duel between the magicians, Gandalf and Saruman. I was inspired by an African idea of how magicians duel with words, which I had read about. It was a way of one entrapping the other as a duel of words rather than special effects flashes, shaking staffs, and all that. I tried to keep away from that a lot, and Boorman did too. [Reads from script]:
GANDALF: Saruman, I am the snake about to strike!
SARUMAN: I am the staff that crushes the snake!
GANDALF: I am the fire that burns the staff to ashes!
SARUMAN: I am the cloudburst that quenches the fire!
GANDALF: I am the well that traps the waters!

"John Boorman and I didn't give too much importance to the Christian component of Tolkien's work. It came across as a tad heavy-handed at times. It is a story of redemption, and that seemed to be enough."

{jumping ahead to elswhere in Plesset's article}
Pallenberg continued, "Because it had to be one movie, and we couldn't waste time with too many complicated effects, I was an advocate of eliminating all flying creatures. I thought it would make it too rich, and it would depart too much from the ordinary. John Boorman agreed on that. At Minas Tirith, instead of a flying steed, the Nazgul Chief rides a horse that 'seems to have no skin. Its live, raw, bleeding flesh is exposed.' I still have this feeling that the dazzle can take away from the fundamental drama. We always tried to do things on the cheap, simply. When you saw a castle in the distance, it could have been made out of anything, even gleaming, high-voltage transmission towers. You saw those in the distance between the trees and then, suddenly, you were inside it. John Boorman is tremendously clever at that."

{jumping further ahead to the article's concluding paragraph}
The script ends with Gandalf, Frodo, Bilbo, Galadriel, Arwen, and Elrond leaving Middle-earth on a sailing ship. A rainbow arcs over the vessel. Legolas, who is watching from shore with Gimli, says, "Look! Only seven colors. Indeed, the world is failing." "I think that's the ideology of the picture," said Pallenberg. "That is from me, not Tolkien. From a physics standpoint, it's incorrect to say that there could be more than seven colors, but what it's saying is, 'we live in a diminished world.'"

Oh, thanks, NFL

It's a Christmas miracle! The NFL commissioner deigns to allow the lowly peasants to watch the NFL Network's game on Saturday night on simul-cast. How magnanimous! How beneficient!

Except, not.

He had his arm twisted by the senate (Specter in particular), who reminded him that the NFL has an exemption from anti-trust laws that lets them rake in money off of tv contracts. And perhaps that exemption would be revoked if Senator Specter, and the rest of us, didn't get to watch the Patriots play the Giants this Saturday.

And yet look how the arm-twisting is portrayed by sports-patsy ESPN. Football is great for a lot of reasons, but the way that ESPN and other major sports outlets (ahem, Sports Illustrated) are so in bed with the NFL is pretty disgusting.

Happy Xmas

The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus needs to be re-inserted into the holiday roster of movies.

"Our powers are as great as yours, Immortal fool!"

And Merry Christmas from me:

Merry Christmas from Carl, also his Bowl picks

His Dark Materials

Here is a review that addresses some of the issues in the hubbub over Pullman's anti-Christianity (in a non-inflammatory manner). Looks like I have some reading to get to. I guess I should read Paradise Lost first (yes, I am that uneducated that I haven't yet read it in all my 27 years).

Four or five edits on this post. I need a nap.

FYI Slaps

It appears Bigface has been reborn. The wheel of time turns....

Micheal Moore endorses Alan Keyes (in 2000)

This has resurfaced from the 2000 presidential campaign. The man I voted for in the 2000 primary (but will not this time) took up Micheal Moore's invitation to body surf in a travelling mosh pit to Rage's Guerilla Radio. Pathetically Gary Bauer criticized him for it in a debate because Rage is, well, anti-american and "pro-Cop killer," etc. (which is sadly true). Needless to say, I'm not a fan of Moore, but it's a bit entertaining.

Do you remember laughter?

Rumors I had read said that they were breaking The Hobbit into 2 movies. How, I don't know. There's really no natural breakpoint in the book (that I remember). So have heart! If he screws it up that badly Robert Plant is sure to piss in his empty eye sockets with his massive Tolkien-bulge.

I look forward to spending this coming coming caturday at the Fairbanks DMV, as, alas my driver's license finally expired. Real-looking ID, here I come! Maybe Santa will be there registering his abandoned boat again.

That Batman trailer really scared me. I don't know if I want to see it. Especially if I'm just going to have nightmares about Heath Ledger-Joker carving my face up with a knife. Jeez.

OMFG PETR JAKSN WTF?!?!?!

So apparently Peter Jackson is producing The Hobbit and, get this, it's sequel. I'm confused. Isn't LOTR basically the sequel to The Hobbit? So what the hell is Jackson doing? I hope this isn't a case of letting all the talk about him being a legendary filmmaker go to his head and just basically doing what he wants. I'm afraid that this is going to be a cinematograpy version of all those shitty Star Wars books about what happens in between the movies (although after the Episodes, I, II & III, the one about Vader being a whiny, needy bitch when a horny green man becomes all buddy-buddy with the Emperor becomes somewhat more along the lines of the story). I don't need someone else telling me what happened in between the Hobbit and LOTR. Bilbo used the ring to avoid the Sackville-Banginses and adopted an heir, which is all very apparent from the first chapter of the Fellowship. The only way I see this being useful is if the "sequel" turns out to be a massive prequel and dumb down The Silmarillion for me. That shit's whack.

New Batman Trailer

is here. I know we all had our doubts about Heath Ledger as the Joker, but I'm actually a little intrigued about seeing it now because he does sort of pull off the whole creepy aspect of the character pretty well (as opposed to Jack Nicholson's sort of goofier take on him). This preview looks like they kept the quality pretty much along the lines of the first one. I'm (re)excited about this now.

Coming soon to America

...the horrors of socialized medicine. Also see this article on the costs of healthcare and the implications of a government takeover.

For Slaps

In honor of registering your mustang while in Alaska...

Billy Squire ridiculousness/gayness

This site made me laugh. Mostly because he also has a link to the "Gay Paul Stanley pic of the week" so...you know...enjoy that. But Bert, he addresses your question of Squire's straightness rather vehemently.

Al Franken Says It's Time to Get Serious

He's got one thing going for him in trying to shake off the funny man image (was he ever really funny?): socialism surely isn't funny. He's running for Senate in Minnesota if you hadn't heard.

Wow!

Did he make that one for Richard Simmons? Honestly, I haven't seen an eighties rock video where a woman was so conspicuously absent.

Is this why there is a rumor that Billy Squire is gay? Can anyone confirm that outside of this admittedly overwhelming circumstantial evidence.

Too bad my tax dollars didn't fund rock instead

I think you know we all contributed to that study with our tax dollars. >:(

This, on the other hand, should make you happy. I couldn't stop laughing for the first half. Bless you early morning VH1 classic.

Mitchell Report

Can be read in all of its 409 page glory here. I think it's funny that a significant portion of the accusations are actually based on hearsay (unnamed stadium employee found a bag of steroids in this players locker or locker room attendant saw an envelope addressed to a player from a "steroid company"). Ridiculous. I wish I had the patience and time to read this because I'm guessing it's just another shoddy example of a half-assed attempt by a Congressman (?) to justify his banging twenty year old interns and getting free vacations from oil companies. Incidentally, I skimmed it a bit and couldn't find a source of funding. Anyone know? Did Mitchell pay out of pocket? Because I hope my tax dollars didn't go towards paying for this sixth grade quality research report.

Clemens

Supposedly Roger Clemens' name is on the big list of baseball druggies being released today. (Though what drugs one has to take to make the list I haven't been able to find yet).

Boy, that sounds really similar to something I said here before.

Damn I hate being right all the time. It's such a burden.

Kissinger on the NIE and Iran

Kissinger has an interesting op-ed in today's Washington Post.

Money quotes:
"When Iran halted its weapons program and suspended efforts at enriching uranium in February 2003, America had already occupied Afghanistan and was on the verge of invading Iraq, both of which border Iran. The United States justified its Iraq policy by the need to remove weapons of mass destruction from the region. By the fall of 2003, when Iran voluntarily joined the Additional Protocol for Nuclear Non-Proliferation, Saddam Hussein had just been overthrown. Is it unreasonable to assume that the ayatollahs concluded that restraint had become imperative? By the fall of 2005, the American effort in Iraq showed signs of bogging down; the prospects for extending the enterprise into Iran were diminishing. Iranian leaders could have felt free to return to their policy of building up a military nuclear capability -- perhaps reinforced by the desire to create a deterrent to American regional aspirations. They might also have concluded, because the secret effort had leaked, that it would be too dangerous to undertake another covert program. Hence the emphasis on renewing the enrichment program in the guise of a civilian energy program. In short, if my analysis is correct, we could be witnessing not a halt of the Iranian weapons program -- as the NIE asserts -- but a subtle, ultimately more dangerous, version of it that will phase in the warhead when fissile material production has matured. "

...

"I have often defended the dedicated members of the intelligence community. This is why I am extremely concerned about the tendency of the intelligence community to turn itself into a kind of check on, instead of a part of, the executive branch. When intelligence personnel expect their work to become the subject of public debate, they are tempted into the roles of surrogate policymakers and advocates."

SHPIGS!!!!

My new favorite animal...tasty and a source of warm clothes!

Golden Compass, in depth

So, as a big fan of the books, I'm fairly split on the outcome of the movie, but in the end I think my thumb points more downwards than upwards.

The film deliver the things I wanted in a massive war bear fight and Sam Elliott as a aeronaut cowboy. Check. Also, it stayed fairly true to the books in that it did not invent any new scenes, and kept very close to the movement of the original story.

Having read the books, I knew what was going on... but I have to grant that anyone who hasn't would be hopelessly lost as Lyra moves from one culture/society to the next. Jordan College is fairly well established, by after that the movie simply moves too fast to get to know any of these other places. The Gyptians, the Bolvars, the war bears, all detailed cultures get basically no treatment in the movie. Even Ms. Coulter's high society gets very little play.

The movie is rescued from terribleness by its particularly strong casting. Elliott, Kidman, Craig... but even here I have a gripe. It seems obvious to me that New Line was so intent on creating a new fantasy hit that they artificially tethered the movie to Harry Potter and LotR in rather obvious and stupid ways. Jordan College, in a dinner scene, strongly resembles Hogwarts. Christopher Lee shows up for the briefest of cameos. And I'm pretty sure that an original voice actor's performance as Iorek was overwritten in favor of Ian McKellan. As a fan of the source material, I can't help but feel a bit betrayed by New Line's shameless hit-mongering.

SPOILER, sort of

Finally, there is a fatal, fatal flaw that both fans of the books and anyone who sees the movie cannot fail to notice. The ending. In the books, the ending is dramatic and powerful, as Asriel (who is not at all a good guy, after all he is playing the part of Satan in Pullman's version of Paradise Lost) sacrifices Lyra's friend Roger to open rifts to other worlds. Lyra is betrayed and awakened to this new reality. It's an ending that would have served as both a cliffhanger for the next film and closure to her adventures in her own world.

Instead, the movie ends several chapters earlier, with Lyra and Roger in Scoresby's airship, heading north towards the lights and essentially begging for a sequel. This is a wimpy, awful ending. Unforgivable, I think.

And it's unfortunate, because Compass is without doubt the most cinematic and much better positioned for a transition to film than the other two books. I don't think the director deserves to do the rest of the books, and in my mind the only thing that could rescue this film is releasing a longer version (the movie is under two hours, it needed 30-40 minutes more all around) that includes the ending from the books.

Probably won't happen, but there is a kind of precedent with Oliver Stone's Alexander. After the first version bombed so bad, Stone recut a longer version that most critics agreed was significantly better. And if the movie 'bombs' (it may not meet expectations, but it will probably recoup its expenses), maybe there will be enough groundswell of fan disapproval and incentive to release a longer, better version on DVD.

3 Reasons To be Excited for Golden Compass

I'm going to see the movie tomorrow, and my biggest 3 reasons for excitement:

3) Sam Elliot

2) The prospect of tussling with protesters either inside or outside of the theater.

1) Armored War Bears.

Also, rumor has it that Philip Pullman originally wanted Samuel L. Jackson to play Lee Scoresby? WTF?!

Interesting, but I'm glad they went with Elliot.

Just how many miles can YOU walk in my Air Force Ones?

I know at one point or another we've all wanted rap cliches mathematically quantified. Done and done.

Prince Caspian looks....IDK

I think we can all agree this is a good lolcat

Unpremeditated

This is not legal jargon as far as I know. I don't know how the Flordia statutes define their levels of murder. Premeditated murder is a colloquial way of saying the actor intended to cause the death of the victim.

Now, who writes state laws? State legislators. Not always the sharpest tools in the shed, let alone great students of English. Perhaps that's what the statute calls a lesser degree of murder. Or perhaps it is just the way the police distinguished it from premeditated murder aka 1st degree murder and other names signifying the conscious intent of the offender was exactly what resulted from his act.

Buckeyes #1? WTF? College football is bad

Now I know I'm going to catch some grief for this, but how in God's name are the buckeyes #1? I think it might be because OSU vs. LSU, plain and simple, is a more billable game and would make the most money out the possible match-ups. Honestly, who did OSU play that would warrant them to play in the title game over undefeated Hawaii, one loss Kansas or any of the two loss teams? I don't understand college football and I don't understand the fans (because I'm sure everyone in C-bus is strutting around like the cock of the walk because OSU is in another title game and how you can be proud about basically buying your way in is beyond me). You can argue that teams benefit from weak schedules in the NFL, but at least there's a play-off system in place and the rewarding of a title isn't arbitrary and money-based (possibly excepting the Steeler's most recent title). As disenchanted as I am with New England this year, I will root for them before I ever root for OSU (or LSU - I'm hoping that they both lose somehow). At least the Patriots are going to earn whatever they get in the end on the field and not in the pocketbooks of the big wigs.

Legal jargon???

"Charles Wardlow, Eric Rivera and Venjah Hunte were denied bond in Fort Myers. All are charged with unpremeditated murder in Taylor's death, a killing police said was unplanned and arose out of a burglary at the player's home."

Unpremeditated murder. "Unpre-" Bert is this actual law speak or is it just the AP suckin balls?

And for the record, is the "pre" even necessary? If a murder is meditated, doesn't that imply thought went into it?

Education

Based on what I've seen here at Case, the most advanced learning environment in the Galactic Federation(and looking at Ashland and basically 99% of the assclowns I see who have college "degrees"), education is simply a business. As long as s/he can pay, any asshole can get a degree with minimal work and absolutely no demonstrable intellectual, moral, social (or any combination) value. Most schools will do everything they can to KEEP students from failing out, even when they have, in fact, already failed. I mean, hey, that's a $30,000 loss if the student leaves. Make him a gym major so we can get his money and he can walk around as a big, proud college grad.

And it's even worse in my department for grad students. It's basically impossible to fail out of this place which pisses me off for two reasons: (1) it's devaluing my doctorate having clueless people graduating at the same "level" as I do (this is the more important of the two) and (2) I hate these people to begin with, so I'm all for removing them from any possible setting where I have to talk to them. I think the idea of education as a right is more prominent at this level because we are being paid to be here, not paying. I think this makes a huge difference a the undergrad level vs. grad level (I know not all departments are paid like we are, but either way the end result is the same: n00bs getting degrees they don't deserve and haven't really earned). It reminds me of Angrybot when he fires his students from school. I wish that would start happening.

PS

Be careful with the Warcraft comments. That might hit a little close to home with some of our contributors.

A sensible thought...

...but not one that I relish since the Buckeyes might get another shot at it. And clearly there have been deserving champions in the last few years even Florida as much as I hate to say it.

Well said, Prof. Larson

(I don't mean the Prof. as a pejorative.)

I think I agree with most of what you said. You are exactly right about knowledge and learning making the student free, hence "liberal education." I'm not as sure what you mean by there cannot be non-politicized education, but I have an idea.

I don't think higher education is about "raising students consciences" and inciting them to political action. In that sense it doesn't have to be politicized. Education should serve the purpose of instilling a civic-mindedness and responsibility as you said. If that is what you mean by politicized then I agree.

"We don't need no education...."

I agree there are “too many people in college,” but only in a sense. I don’t believe higher education should be exclusionary, in the sense that it is inaccessible to people who want access to it. Knowledge and literacy are the only weapons that can actually make people free, and they should be available to everyone. So I don’t buy into any theoretical limitations on how may should be there. Ideally the whole civilization should desire, pursue, and attain a “higher” education (admittedly, a slippery term).

I think there are “too many,” though, in the sense that not all of the bodies occupying seats in the academy are really there for that “higher” education itself, but for some other reason. Sowell rightly points out several of these. We can all relate to this from our AU days as well as any post-graduate studying we may have done.

It’s no big secret that the academy has been drifting steadily and inexorably from an enlightening/enriching model to an industrial/corporate training model for decades (1970 was the last time more than half of college students had liberal arts majors). But the situation has shifted so far toward “training good little workers” that traditional educational goals—critical thinking, moral reflection, civic responsibility—seem antiquated and irrelevant to the culture at large. I imagine that even in the Middle Ages, university students resented having to study certain subjects. But a huge portion of the students I teach honestly think history, philosophy, political science, foreign language, literature, and art courses are just ploys by the university to get their money (not coincidentally, those students usually only produce the most superficial, banal work). Perhaps things look a bit worse to me because of where I’m working: KSU-Tuscarawas is a remote, rural branch that only has a handful of majors, all of which are “vocational.” (That’s not to say I don’t get some absolutely awesome students—most of whom are non-traditional students with full time jobs and families—but core classes are generally looked at with raised eyebrows.)

There’s evidence things aren’t much different elsewhere. John Sperling, CEO of the company that brought you University of Phoenix, offers this enlightened assessment: “This is a corporation […] Coming here is not a rite of passage. We are not trying to develop [students’] value systems or go in for that ‘expand their minds’ bullshit.” If this ethos is representative of our view of higher ed, then it’s no wonder so many students are simply keeping seats warm (and trying to get laid, or playing Warcraft all day in the dorm, or whatever).

Maybe this is the problem: the intrinsic “value” of an education is self-evident to those who have one, but it’s a tough sell to those who don’t already see it. Nearly all of the messages we are bombarded with appeal to instant gratification and transient pleasure. Contemplating Plato’s Philosopher King or identifying with Hamlet’s indecision aren’t easily packaged in those terms, so why bother with them? Since I’m just going to be a nurse, thinking about Federalism is a waste of my time.

I really think that if students could pay the fee and pick up a degree at a drive-thru, they would. I think it sucks.

(And there has never been, nor can there ever be, a “non-politicized” education.)

You're a big tool if...

... you say 'vacay' instead of vacation or 'tat' in place of tattoo.

Like this: "I took a week off for a beach vacay at the Outer Banks but I couldn't go because my new tat got infected and the doctors had to cut off my arm."

Of this, there can be no dispute.

RIP

Drinkin' to my man Kevin and pissin' off the neighbors with the Metal Health album on repeat.
And there's this:


Also, I watched this: :(

Awwwwww

Kevin DuBrow apparently is dead. :o(

What's that you say?

I haven't posted anything from Mark Steyn for a while? Well, I had stopped reading him for a while because I was tired of hearing how pathetic Westerners are in the face of the rising tide, demographically and politically, of Islamists. The humor of the idea of lefties making nice with Wahhabis who would behead them given the opportunity wears off once the reality sinks in.

But anyway, here you go. From a recent column:

Apparently there are still one or two holdouts who decline to prostrate themselves before Al Gore. As ABC reporter David Wright fretted, “Even the Nobel Prize is not going to be enough to silence the naysayers . . .”
Ah, so true. Say what you like about Al’s predecessor in the pantheon of glory, the late Yasser Arafat, but there was a guy who knew how to silence naysayers and, when he needed to, he didn’t leave it to the luster of his Nobel.

Harry Reid is pathetic

Apparently the Democrats decided to have one Senator come in and bang the gavel to hold a 30 second session every day but Thanksgiving last week to avoid the possibility of recess appointments. Have we reached a new low in representative democracy?

Here is a humorous take.

Too many people in college?

I don't think there is any doubt really. Tom Sowell argues this is the case, and I bet Nick could attest to it as well.

However, I don't know how harmful it is. This dovetails with one of Allan Bloom's arguments as well. I think it has been destructive of the core purpose of universities just as politicization of education has. College is a place to spend a few fun years, get a degree, and hopefully a job rather than a detached center of learning, somewhat independent and separate from the commerical and political world. It is now higher learning only in the sense that it is a higher level than high school not in the sense that the learning somehow transcends practicality.

Any thoughts?

Drive with God

As a rather lackadaisical Catholic, I must admit I'm somewhat relieved that Vatican is concerned with my car maintenance and road safety...

Actors, warts, etc

Nick, have you read the comments by the dood playing Dumbledore? He won't even read the books because he doesn't want to be constrained by the character's role or some such shit. It's ridiculous. As his weak portrayal of Dumbledore, IMO.

This makes me a happy man. I didn't actually read the article because the subtitle and picture are enough for me.

As for the tree man, I just want to point out that he has a daughter. So someone slept with Warty McTree. I'm going to go vomit.

This is fracking INSANE

Just go read/look at the pictures. Criminy. I don't even know what to say.

Happy Thanksgiving

I wish I had had one of these :o(

At the risk of being mocked

I want to just let everyone know there is a new Battlestar Galactica movie on Sci-Fi tonight at 9.

My Thanksgiving Message to Actors: STFU

There's this thing that really irks me when actors express disdain for original source material (books, novels, old english poems) because it doesn't give them enough raw grist to show off their considerable acting chops.

I give you Ray Winstone, the motion-captured face of the new Beowulf movie (which, by the way, shouldn't actually be called Beowulf but actually Neil Gaiman's Olde Timey Englishe Monsterre Rompe): "I had the beauty of not reading the book, which I understand portrays Beowulf as a very one-dimensional kind of character - a hero and a warrior and that was it. I didn't have any of that baggage to bring with me."

Excuse me, fuck you. I don't want to hear how you were liberated from the restrictions of the source material so you could bring 'depth' to the character. Especially when the source material is one of the most venerated and studied pieces of writing in the English language. Read the book, and put it on screen. Is that so much to ask? Apparently it is.

I remember David Wenham (the guy who played Faramir in Lord of the Rings) saying something very similar... 'Faramir's such a flat character, too good and honest and whatnot, totally boring to play on-screen!' to paraphrase loosely. Piss off, dude. You don't have to turn every freaking thing you do into Fucking Streetcar Named Goddamn Desire. Stop dicking with the source material so you can show off your range.

If the character's flat, play the flat character and STFU.

Enjoy:

Too late...

Val Venis (holy crap, remember him???) already threw his weight behind Ron Paul! I say Flair and Venis wrestle over who will take Iowa. John Cena will go McCain or Guiliani. The big question is who The Hulk will go with. Predictions?

I agree with you on Huckabee, except that I hate almost ALL of his positions. But he at least seems like a guy you could have a beer with and talk about the Stones (one of his favorite bands). The only other candidate you could say that about would be McCain (and probably Obama).

Chuck Norris *and Ric Flair?!

So, Mike Huckabee has cornered the market on internet-celebrity and washed-up wrestler endorsements. This may be a disturbing but entertaining new trend in politics. I want to see the candidates scurry and pander to the likes of the Macho Man or the the Undertaker. I can see the headline now... "Tom Tancredo and the Undertaker place a moratorium on the death tax... in hell!"

This is kind of like Family Guy/American Dad winning the best recurring guest roles award with Adam West and Patrick Stewart. Both are awesome, but most of the time neither actually makes for a better episode.

Joking aside, I kind of like Huckabee. Other than the fact that I think he'd make a terrible president, he seems fairly honest, and he's one of the least boring candidates to watch.

Re: Holy Crap

My favorite part from that link is the way the excited scientist can't quite complete his chain of alliteration.

Dr Simon Braddy, University of Bristol said, "This is an amazing discovery. We have known for some time that the fossil record yields monster millipedes, super-sized scorpions, colossal cockroaches, and jumbo dragonflies, but we never realised, until now, just how big some of these ancient creepy-crawlies were.

Monster millipedes! Super-sized scorpions! Colossal cockroaches! And... err.... uhh.... damn-big dragonflies? Disastrous? Double-packed? Diabolical? Hey, kids, pay attention to science, we got giant bugs! Hello? Anyone there?? Hellooooooooooooo?!?!

Holy crap

This scares the ever-lovin bejesus out of me. More than sharks, squids and octopii combined.

Awesomeness

I can't remember if this made it up or not yet (mostly because I use the so called "internets" for the downloading of certain movies to aid masturbation), but I'm putting it up regardless because it's pretty damn cool. A larger one with pretty good resolution (but no penetration) here.

Re: Belichick

Nick, I think the sappy folks over at espn wrote this one for you. He has an "inner teddy bear." Needless to say, I didn't read much past that little caption under the title. Perhaps you will though, and you can develop a love for the "monotone man of mystery."

Belichick

I want to be there when you get yours. That is all.

Football Night in America

on NBC (right before the sunday late night game) is the worst football commentary on TV.

Album recommendation

Just got Levon Helm's new cd, "Dirt Farmer" and it is amazing. If you don't know, he was the drummer/singer from the band (he sang "up on Cripple Creek") and has a very distinct voice. His new cd is all traditional folk or older folk music. I cannot reccomend it enough.

And for the record, I don't hate the lolcats, John just somehow manages to pick the most annoying ones possible. Most of them are pretty funny.

Also, the new Gram Parsons archive release has a cover of the Everly Brothers ("When will I be loved") that is also pretty awesome. If anybody else knows who Gram Parsons is.

They call me Dr. Law...

These are weak charges. Obviously they don't have the evidence to get him on substantive charges. This is what happened to Lewis Libby and Martha Stewart as well (although I am much more sympathetic to them than Bonds). Either the prosecutors are convinced that Bonds is guilty of whatever they were investigating but do not have the evidence they need, or they are trying to get Bonds to roll over on someone. Either way, your impression was right on, Nick.

Bonds

While I hope that Bonds steps on glass and rusty nails and all that to wipe that smug grin off his face, aren't these charges kinda weak? Perjury and obstruction of justice? Isn't that what people get charged with when the investigators can't find enough evidence to charge with a real crime?

Bert, show us them sexy legal brains and sort this out.

Getting excited for Rock Band

And you should too. Watching this gets me pumped up.

Barry Bonds Indicted

That's right. Jerk.

More Cats

Since Slaps hates the cat pictures, I have made a caption for him.

Slaps upon checking his eharmony account.

Slaps

you have to like this one...

Warren Buffett Sucks

Many look to Warren Buffett as a business and charity hero. I think he's not so great although he admittedly has a talent for making money.

I had heard about Buffett and Berkshire Hathaway's practice of leaching off the estate tax scheme a couple years ago, and saw this article yesterday that also touched on the life insurance aspect of this leaching.

Buffett buys up smaller companies upon the death of their owners when the families and estates cannot afford to keep the companies going because of estate taxes. Further, Buffet is in the life insurance business. Since life insurance is tax free to beneficiaries, people put their wealth in insurance instead of more productive vehicles so that it can pass to their families instead of being confiscated by the government.

Bloom and bicycles

The bike path guy reminded me of this hilarious Dave Foley sketch from kids in the hall. Sorry I couldn't find the audio, but I'm at work. (This is why John thought I'd find the article funny I believe.)

Most of us like rock n roll, and like you, Nick, I have trouble with that chapter. Bloom took a lot from Plato there, and he makes a forceful argument. I think we just can't bear the thought of giving up the music we like, and we probably won't even if we come to grips with Bloom.

Glad to hear you used the book in class. It is one of the best polemical/philosophical books I've read. There is a lot of difficult stuff in it, but it is a good read.

My new favorite coach

is Kansas head coach Mark Mangino. Below is all the explanation that is needed (with regards to the outfit: it's valoooor).

Funny

Or at least Bert will also think this is pretty humorous...I hope.

Watch Your Step Kid,

Protect ya neck

and

"Things that are balls nasty"

Speaking of running up the score

How about that GB/ Minn. game?

Bloom

In a fit of righteous spite, I 'borrowed' the only copy of Closing of the American Mind from ISI's library on my way out the door, and over the past year I've read almost all of it, though out of order.

I used some sections of it (those specifically pertaining to the university and its roles and functions) in my freshmen classes this semester, and I think it was effective... the students, now approaching the end of their first semester, have uncovered a trouble paradox. The university, they unanimously agree, is there to prepare them for their careers--and yet the university teaches nothing that is directly useful to a majority those careers, and very little that is indirectly useful. What, then, are they doing there? (I've asked that question repeatedly this semester... sometimes rhetorically, sometimes in frustration.) They can find no answer except the cynical one, the degree they earn is simply a prerequisite for their career of toil and drudgery. Since I'm teaching a comp class and not a class on Bloom we don't have time to read more than a few selections, but at least they are asking questions.

I've read Steyn's piece on Bloom a couple of times and, in conjunction with Bloom's chapter on music, I have a really tough time with it. I like rock music... I like playing it, as I can, I like listening to it, I like watching it live. I enjoy listening to it while I drive or run, and I like putting it on in the background while I'm doing other things. Does this place my soul in jeopardy? As I read Bloom, he thinks that it does. And there are many legitimate points there... as it pertains to the sexual nature of rhythm and violent/stupid/pointless lyrics. But Steyn goes so far (maybe echoing Bloom) as to lump the music in with the musicians, when that separation is key. Just ask Bert when Eddie Vedder was tearing G.W. Bush masks in two on stage in '04. What would Bloom say about an internet and itunes that lets anyone grab any song they like? There's no need to invest in the artist, to discover who he/she is, their sexual history, how they act on stage, their politics. There's only one music personality, I think, who has nearly perfectly melded his off-stage persona (or character, even) to the experience of producing his music, and that is Bono, but I've gotten pretty far afield. Suffice it to say, Bloom's music chapter is really tough, and I still don't know how to think about it.

Mostly South Park

I agree with most of your assessment of South Park. However, I have to disagree about the Imagination trilogy. While as a narrative, it didn't really go anywhere it had the best and most pop culture references I've ever seen. Seriously, I mean part 3 had ROM the Spaceknight, part 2 had a prolonged Stargate reference AND Manbearpig, and part 1 had the funniest joke they've ever done (which of course was the Butters/rape joke which still makes me wet my pants). Now that I think about it, Butters is probably my favorite character in any show ever. Including my favorite show, Futurama (end of the month, new movie!!!).

As for this week's episode, I didn't think it was as similar to the WoW episode as you. I thought it was more a parody of rock bands/musicians (Behind the Music) and the fact that the kids thought game was cool, the actual music not so much. I mean, they kept making heroin jokes (chasing the dragon was fantastic).

I used to watch the Fox sunday cartoon/whatever block, but i really don't care that much anymore. With the exception of King of the Hill, which I still think is the superior sunday show (right now).

Re: Green Week

I agree, Kris. The 'Earl-30 Rock-Office-Scrubs' corridor of NBC Thursday is just about the best of TV, conveniently lumped together for me.

As for South Park... combining last night's episode (Guitar Hero was the theme) with the World of Warcraft one, I think the message is that if you a play a game too much you're a douche? I'm mean, sure, I buy the message, but this is what you come up with given the subject matter? A bit lame. But it is funny to see how the parent companies implicitly play along while the show skewers their games and the people who play them (Blizzard helped the South Park guys make the warcraft episode, and it seems to me the Guitar Hero folks helped with last night's, or at least they ran a commercial spot during it).

Coupled with the the Imagination Trilogy of the past month, it doesn't seem to me like these guys have much of anything to say anymore.

Increasingly South Park has fallen into two categories, one of which is 'Libertarian moralizing' as someone I can't remember coined it, and the second is immediate quick and dirty cultural/social commentary (as in X event happens on the weekend... we will satirize and spoof it by Thursday night). I sympathize with the former, and sometimes the latter is extremely witty, but neither is really a good vehicle for bringing the funny.

The Closing of the American Mind at 20 years

Allan Bloom's book was published in 1987. If you have not read it, you must. This year being the 20th anniversary of publication, The New Criterion's November issue has several essays on the book and its reception also worth reading whether you've read the book or not.

Cool science

A lab at Harvard fluorescently tagged every neuron in the mouse brain. The result? Cool.
Even better? They're calling the "brainbow mouse."

Re: Green Week

Bert, I don't know if you caught them but both My Name is Earl and 30 Rock had hilarious takes on the Green Week crap. Earl's message was essentially they were being forced to add a "green message" because the suits upstairs said so. 30 Rock was even more biting. You can watch the episodes on nbc.com . Aside from football and South Park, the thursday NBC comedies are the TV shows I watch. Otherwise, it's VH1 classic, all the time!

NBC's Green Week

Green Week kicked of on Sunday night with Bob Costas and the boys lighting candles and turning off the lights for Sunday night football. This silliness is going on all week with NBC pretending to help the environment and trying to make you and me feel bad about our way of life. Annoying. Show me football and make me laugh. Please don't pretend that you're saving the world from this week's faddish apocalyptic catastrophe.

BEST CAMPAIGN AD EVER

Speaks for itself.

Couldn't decide

so I'll let you pick Bert...

Holy crap

This is friggen' cool! I just need to figure out which cities have the highest population of single, alcoholic, post-secondary degreed East Asian girls! (I'll cross my fingers that it's San Diego, Dallas, NYC or Boston or outlying suburbs).

Asterisk for Football?

Sounds dumb, but since it seems at least better than average odds that the patriots go undefeated, should they get an asterisk for the whole spying on other teams? I think it's a legitimate point, especially if steroids are considered cheating, since, uh, it's hard to cheat more blatantly than to film the other team's signals.

Vince Young (Bert this one's for you)

Just a quick stat line on the "star" QB of the Titans:

"Not only has Vince Young not passed for 200 yards in a single game this season...in his last four starts he has thrown for a grand total of 429 yards, 0 touchdowns and 6 interceptions."

Bert, he has 3tds and 8 picks this season. I saw this and thought of you after our conversation yesterday. JB said he made the Pro Bowl last year (not sure - don't remember cuz that's a joke game), but if he did he did it with a 51.5% completion, 12td and 13 picks. I know he's young (pun not intended), but he's very clearly not the reason for the Titans winning.

I think it's safe to say that a dominant (or even decent) QB isn't necessary to win in the NFL. The Titans are doing it in the toughest division (in my opinion) in football with the 2nd lowest rated passer in the league (his 61.5 is only better than Alex Smith).

Kudos to the Titans defense/running game.

I R stoopid at foosball

In drawing up my scenarios, I neglected to mention the one that seems to always happen when I bother to watch the Patriots play from start to finish. Opposing team wins the first 3 quarters, Patriots win the 4th and then win the game. Infuriating.

Why the NFL is stupid

I enjoy watching football. However, I hate the NFL's stupid, terrible blackout rules. Unless I go to a bar (or get satellite, which I damn sure can't afford) I am stuck watching just ONE goddamn game at 1 (Cinci-Buf? wtf? seriously) and the Cleveland game at 4. I've enjoyed watching Cleveland this season, but really, THE game to watch is the NE-Indy game at 4. And its not even an option. It really pisses me off, especially since those are the two games I would flip between. I hope whoever made the blackout rule gets AIDS and dies. Eff them.

Leroy's Old

Leroy Jenkins has been around for a couple years, they even have commercials now....

NFL gets decided tomorrow

Here's the scenarios, from most likely to least, imo:

1) Pats win in a blowout (+21 pts or more). I think, unfortunately, this is most likely to happen. And if it does, you can turn off football for the rest of the season. At that point, the only thing that could stop the Pats is a season-ending injury to Brady.

2) Pats win in by 7 to 14 pts. This is almost as bad as option 1. If they dominate the Colts but don't run up the score, then the effect is nearly the same. Again, nothing stopping them at this point except Brady getting hurt.

3) Colts win in a squeeker. From a football fan's PoV, this is probably the best thing that could happen. It builds drama and sets up a titanic rematch in the AFC championship game, at which point you can then ignore the superbowl completely, just like last year.

4) Colts win in a blowout. Heh. Even if this were to occur, I think it tracts the same as 3. The Pats seem so otherworldly that even a blowout against them here could be channeled into 'motivation' or some other stupid analyst-speak quantity for the AFC championship game. But this seems really unlikely to me.

5) Pats jet crashed on the way to Indy, an unknown team of hardscrabble and over-the-hill replacements dons the Patriots uniforms, discovers that the original team made a deal with Satan, repudiates this deal and loses by a field goal to Indy, but at the same time earns the respect of Peyton Manning and millions of television viewers. Hardscrabble replacement QB reconciles with his amputee wife at the end. Hey, wanna see my screenplay?

Meatloaf retires?

::tear::

WOW

For those of you who don't get this (and those that do, the clip still makes me lol!) the clip referenced is below. It gets really funny around 1:20, but the whole thing is worth a watch.

Supermice

Actually, in the scientific community those mice are old news. The paper was published online months ago and at least 2 other labs have already shown (though 1 remains unpublished) similar results by tweaking different aspects of the same metabolic cycle. So I don't really understand the big deal now.
That being said, the lab that made them is in my department (Biochemistry) right down the hall from me and the data is kind of exciting. However, I know from talking to Richard Hanson (and other members of his lab) that there are all kinds of other phenotypes these mice display that were too complex to report. These mice are apparently VERY agressive, among other abnormal behavorial phenotypes, all of which are hard to pin down due to their complex natures. That being said, it is a very artificial system from which to draw important physiological conclusions. But also, it is very cool.

This is kinda neat

ESPN uses some crazy statistical analysis to predict performances, stats, scores etc. of football games. I won't pretend to understand any of what they do, but I'm going to see how close they come.

Case's Super Mice

Do you guys know anything about this? Can they alter my genes so I can get bigger and run faster?

Why Football is Tops in My Book

You may have seen this already, but if you haven't, here it is. If I were the coach of the purple team, I'd whup some ass for letting this happen, but I love it.

Coach of the year

I nominate Jeff Fisher. The Titans are 5-2 and who can name a starter on that team besides Vince Young? He's making professional "nobodies" play like mad. Sure, their wins are ugly, but they win. And without the big name talent of Cincy, San Diego, Indy or NE. I think it's pretty impressive that he keeps his team competitive no matter how awful they "should" be.

Nick Barnett:

You are a beautiful, wonderful man.

Paul Krugman

blames Rambo, Chuck Norris, and Patrick Swayze for Americans' distrust of Democrats with national security. This is serious insight from a serious (read liberal hack) economist, academic, and columnist. Oh, and Ronald Reagan only beat Jimmy Carter because he 'red-baited' and 'race-baited.'

For Bert

In honor of Bert passing the Bar...and me still finding him handsome.

Hating winners

I don't hate a team for winning, I hate them for being the bears. Or for just rubbing it in and padding stats. I cannot respect Brady & Co. anymore. It makes me sad because I liked Welker. But that was tasteless and tacky and in poor sportsmanship what they did last night against the redskins. I can't root for such jerks. They are probably one of the most talented teams ever assembled, but they are just being schoolyard bullies. Nothing more. It's bad enough to be throwing bombs up by 40 in the 4th but to put your second string guys in and still pass to score (it was 45-0 with just under 6 left in the game when they went down and scored the last td -not like washington was coming back). At any rate, I respect their talent. It is immense. The means to which they use it however, is unworthy of respect, in my opinion.

catching up with the blog

1. John, keep the cats coming. Love 'em. Quit discouraging it, Kris.

2. Thanks for the kind Congratulations, JB.

3. No thanks for your silly sports commentary, JB.

a. Browns didn't really give up much to get Quinn. Most people thought it was fortuitous that he was still around at that point in the draft. Miami fans were pissed when the Dolphins took Ginn over him. I'm not saying that Quinn is good--I thought he and ND were way overated as the Buckeyes proved in the 2006 bowl game--but it would have been very hard to pass on him at the time. Let me remind you that you were not praising Anderson in the pre-season or at any prior time when he played.

b. How can a team that sweeps the world series be overpaid? Looks like their paychecks are deserved to me. Which brings me to...

... 4. Hating winners. I understand resentment toward successful teams. However, it is a sign of weakness--of the self and of one's preferred team--to hate others for their success. It is good for sports to have a healthy dislike for ones rivals, but hating winners demonstrates thier power over you and your deficient character. Have righteous contempt for unseemly and unsportsmanlike behavior, but do not hate teams for beating you. Respect it, and get better.

5. I missed games 5 and 6 of the Indians-BoSox series. From what I can tell, that was a good thing. In the games I watched, however, I did not come to the conclusion that Wedge couldn't manage. The most I could fault him with was playing Amerian league style instead of bunting or running in a few situations which is hardly a fault in the AL. The Bottom line is Indians stars did not show up. Sizemore, Hafner, Sabathia, and Carmona did not perform. Don't blame Wedge.

Well,

I really hated the BoSox until Fred Willlard announced their lineup. So, I guess i like them right now.

Football

It used to be that the only team I rooted for to lose every game was the bears. I now add new england to that list. what jerks.

Brady's a penis

Sorry, I won't deny his skill, but he is a classless man. It's 38-0 in the 4th quarter and your throwing a bomb? And don't give me any crap about Belichik callin the play. Change it at the line or dump it off to a halfback. Everyone knows Bill's a tremendous cock. When Peyton was going for the record, he called audibles to runs and took knees when they were burying people, even when he was only 1 td away. Yea, Belichik (or whoever) is calling the plays, but Brady should have some honor and play with dignity, not to pad his stats.

HGH

Right, but as far as baseball rules go (I think) HGH is classified as a "steroid." They don't do science in baseball else they'd all know that it wasn't steroids that helped Bonds but his mighty robo-arm.

HGH vs steroids

HGH is not a steroid, it is a hormone. Steroids are a special class of hormones which include testosterone and androsterone, derivitives of which you guys likely mean when you refer to steroids. Steroids are are 4-membered rings with various side chains, while HGH, on the other hand, is a gene-based protein. (Testosterone steroid on the left, HGH protein on the right)

Byrd

Are you suggesting that the degree matters? He used HGH, which he obtained from a clinic being investigated for similar charges as Bond's supplier. You can read about it here, but he was taking HGH before his elbow surgery (I assume that's the injury you referenced). He claims it was to help him sleep. As it stands, there have been no medical exceptions to baseball's HGH policy. None. Either way, I would guess you feel the same way about Giambi or Palmiero who took HGH, so their noble baseball track records are also clean? It's a steroid either way you cut it. You can't pick and choose who gets to use it or why.

Congratulations, BMG

As many of you know, Bert Matthew George conquered the bar exam. This, in turn, deserves a hearty congratulations for the hard work he put in and the excellent lawyer he will become.



Congratulations, Bert-I am proud to be your friend.



JB

Byrd

I hope you didn't just imply that Byrd and Bonds were the same, because you know better. First of all, HGH isn't the real issue because it wasn't banned by baseball until 2004 or 2005. So I really don't care that Bonds took HGH. And don't tell me "accused" as if Bonds didn't take steroids, because he did. The evidence is overwhelming. Also don't tell me that he has passed every test, because they didn't start testing until 2004. His trainer when to JAIL for administering illegal performance substances. The trainer did not roll over on Bonds, or Barry would already be out of baseball or in jail himself. The feds are building a case, as we know. Now, as to Roger Clemens, I wouldn't doubt it. But don't act like Barry didn't take steroids, because he did, and don't act like steroids isn't cheating, because it is, and don't act like Byrd and Bonds are the same, because they aren't even close.

1. Bonds has taken way more than HGH.

2. Bonds has lied about it.

3. Bonds trainer when to jail.

4. Byrd was recovering from a devastating injury that nearly ruined his career, that is when he developed that crazy windup. Byrd was using it under prescription and stopped before baseball even banned it.

5. I don't care that Babe Ruth womanized and Ty Cobb was a jerk. That didn't affect the way the game is played. I mean, Michael Irvin got into the Football Hall of Fame, and he is the worst person ever to live.

Re: You and your damn cats

This one's in honor of you liking corn more than any human ever, Lord Cornkernalton.

Hm

I guess Jarrod had some free time.

Byrd

HGH was one of the big three Bonds is accused of taking. It's what Giambi and several other prominent and not prominent players use/have used and been accused of using. It's one of the major guys that led to all the congressional nonsense. If you maintain it gave Bonds or Giambi an advantage, then you have to call down Byrd as well. He's admitted he did take them (just found that out).

America

Answer me this-why does America tolerate the existence of hostile Syrian and Iranian regimes intent on arming themselves to the teeth and checking American support in the region at every turn? It isn't because of lack of strength, and it isn't because they care about upsetting the Arab street, (see Iraq). Iran has been funding the Hezbollah, since, oh, 1979. We do nothing. NOTHING. Iran funds and even provides soliders for the Iraq insurgency. We do NOTHING.

Count me confused. I hope we continue our "dialogue" with Iran to "persuade" them not to develop a nuke-bomb. I am sure they will "promise" not to use it on Israel.

I am not necessarily talking invasion-but no "democratic" experiment in Iraq can possibly work with these two countries on its borders. What is the point, I say, do something right or do it not at all. Iraq will not spread democracy in the Mid-East simply by exisiting.

I see no hope in the foreign policy-knuckleheads now running for President. Going to be a long year.

Derek Anderson

No way Brady Quinn should play right now. Maybe not even next year.

Reasons:

1. Derek Anderson is steady as she goes. Quinn is wound tight.

2. Derek Anderson can throw it farther and faster-period.

3. Derek Anderson is much taller.

4. Derek Anderson isn't a media, endorsement, photo-shoot whore.

5. Derek Anderson doesn't charge $75 for his autograph, unlike his No. 2.

6. But, Browns management is too stupid to realize this and will play Quinn because they gave up so much to get him even though it is impossible for Quinn to play better than Anderson has played this year. Dumb.

Paul Byrd

So he took HGH, which wasn't banned by baseball at the time, to recover from his injury, which jeopardized and completely changed his career. This is a story?! Sometimes I swear baseball is retarded. He wasn't taking Barry Bonds-type 'roids, and he isn't associated with all the BALCO stuff. Get real. Also, Byrd better be on the roster next year or I will start a rebellion.

Why the Football Gods Will Curse the Patriots

This article from espn.com http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=easterbrook/071023&sportCat=nfl


It goes a little over the top, but I have to say the premise is convincing. I have come to believe that all the talking about "team" and the assertion that the Pats pay no attention to "stats, touchdowns and points" is a bunch of mularkey. This team is exactly the opposite of what it pretends to be. It is selfish, arrogant, feels entitled, condescending, haughty and worst of all-unsportsmanlike. And it starts with the trifecta of ugly sportsmanship, that is, Belichick, Vrabel, Harrison, Brady and Moss. Obviously, the Patriots don't really care about team and character and all that crap they spew if they are going to sign Randy Moss in the first place. Yes, he is having a monster year, and yes he is a great wide receiver. But, he is still a gigantic gigantic piece of trash. A complete waste of a human being, of not value except for the ability to leap and catch footballs. But, his indiscretions are well documented. Let us move on.

Vrabel is a showboating, dirty, classless, mean and arrogant football player. He doesn't get as much publicity as others on the team, but he hits people low and dirty (ask Drew Bledsoe in the '98 playoffs) and tries to hurt people, much like his lover-buddy Harrison. You don't hear as much about Vrabel because the people he is hurting or diving at are offensive lineman and nobody cares about or sees it. Harrison himself is downright dirty, I wish him nothing but ill.

Belichick is a donkey's nut-sack. Leaving the new cheating scandal aside, for much has been written on that, neverthess Belichick's arrogance is legendary. First of all, he is not a genius. Football does not make men mountains of genius. Bill Belichick does not know more than the next guy about the game of football. His football maxims are trite and ridiculous, and does he actually think we believe his "I misunderstood the rules" line of horse puckey? The league, for its part, is in full damage control mode and won't let out any more information and destroyed much of the accompanying documentation. That leads one to assume there is much more to the story. But even if there isn't, what a sham this man is.

Why are the Pats running up the score every game if they don't care about numbers? What kind of sportmanship is throwing the ball deep down the field when you are up 28 points? I hate this team, this organization. I hate the arrogant coach, I hate the numb-skulled owner, and I hate the pretending to be everything I am not quarterback.

No denying they are good, they are probably the best team in football right now. But that is not why I hate them, I hate them for who they are. They remind me of the Red Sox, that arrogant, over-paid, vain, petulant bunch of pigs that made it to the World Series because Eric Wedge is the worst in-game manager I have ever seen. He is good at managing talent and brining in the right people, but lord's sake he doesn't know how to handle an actual game. Good god.

You and your damn cats

Sometimes I really hate you.

Saw Porcupine Tree last night, my review here.

Drive-By Truckers tomorrow, Ween thursday.

Busy week.

Re: Harry Potter News?

Tribe part 2

Really Wedge??? Lofton on 3rd and a man on 1t with 1 out and you don't steal 2nd??? Wait...double play??? really???? You're terrible Wedge. Gove Boston the championship you dick.

Bungles

In my day of mad posts:

You know you're a shitty RB when you can't score against the Bungles. You blow cake Thomas Jones.

RE: good to eat

That looks like the most delicious thing I've ever dreamed of eating. Holy Mother of God I want one now.

Indians

So it's the 3rd inning of game 7 and I've decided Wedge is the worst coach ever. Granted I haven't played baseball in years and I'm a little drunk, but I can't believe how he calls his games. This is god damn awful. I could have 17 more beers and still make better decisions. Fuck Wedge. I'm rooting for the Tribe and I hate boston ( I refuse to capitalize their name), but Wedge is so bad. This team is better off without a coach and just playing. Also peralta is a god damn terrible defensive shortstop. I'll give up his 20 hrs a season for a guy that can field a high chopper and turn the god damn double play. Terrible. Fuck Wedge and fuck peralta.

PS WHAT THE FUCK CALLIN BYRD OUT FOR STEROIDS WHEN SHILLING AND CLEMENS ARE STILL PITCHING LIKE THAT. I hate major league baseball. Hate.

Harry Potter news?

OK:

Read this ONLY if you've finished Deathly Hallows AND if you want to know who is gay. It's kind of weird, but I don't really think it matters.

And BTW Nick, the Neil Young Archive series is awesome. So far, those 2 albums are my favorite in the NY catalogue and I can't wait for the box set which has been further delayed until Feb last I heard.

A.V. Club's Primer on Neil Young

I've long thought the real value of the Onion was not in it's eerily on-target spoofy news, but in the clever a.v. Club. I agree with the movie reviews there quite a lot (i.e. Brett Ratner is a big douche), disagree with the music reviews quite a lot (they seem to think Arcade Fire is the next best wonderband), but on the whole I think the a.v. Club is a fairly decent filter for media and culture.

Anyway, they've got a nice Primer up on Neil Young, which is really helpful for someone like me who's more of a passive Neil Young fan, knowing most of his 'hits,' but really clueless as to where to go next in trying to discover his music.

Do Awards Mean Anything Anymore

On the heels of AlGore's Nobel triumph, Chris Matthews is receiving an award for being Churchillian.

GOOD TO EAT

No somebody tell me why we don't have any damn Hardee's around here! 2 sausage, ham, bacon, cheese omlettes, hash browns and sausage gravy. Get thee to a Hardee's, posthaste!
From Reason.

Apparently,

that asshole in the playoffs commercials is Dane Cook. I'm pretty happy I didn't know that and he still pissed me off. That douche needs to stfu and comb his damn hair. And get kicked in the balls by me.

BoSox Pitching

I don't follow the American League to closely since I'm a Reds fan (plus the DH is the devil's creation). However, statistically the Indians had the best starting rotation in the league I believe as well as two of the best five starters according to ERA. Beckett has been great for the Sox this year with the most wins and 6th in ERA, and they have one of the best closers in Papelbon.

Now that I checked the stats, I see that Boston had the best team ERA in the AL (Indians were 3rd), so their bull pen was better than Cleveland's this year. The Indians relievers have pitched fairly well thus far, though. And don't forget, the Indians were 2nd in all of baseball last year in runs scored and 8th this year, so they can put up runs too.

Baseball question

So I don't normally follow baseball (too many games to keep track of, etc) but I watch the Indians occasionally at the bar if they're on. And I've been watching postseason (much easier to keep track of). So here is my question for you who know better. Is Boston's pitching really that bad? As far as I can tell the Indians pitching has smoked Boston, but like I said I really have no idea. I admit Boston's offense is crazy-stupid good. But pitching-wise they have failed to impress me at least.

And I love both The White Stripes and Casey Blake. But that's just hangover talk.

Wow!!!!!

Thanks for that Kris. Butt rock made my morning.

Butt rock 4 lyfe!

This is the most fantastic buttrock video I have ever seen. It is 7 minutes of pure, longhaired, tight-pantsed, awesome rock. Enjoy.

NP

Al Gore wins Nobel prize: SC rules in favor of Bush.

Nick:

I expect a rough outline sometime next week. And shame for discussing anything Arnold-related without a mighty picture!

Re: I like some of these guys

Me too! That list is dumb. You can legitimately criticize lyrics for being stupid, vapid, or ridiculously over-the-top, and every lyricist is going to be guilty of those over the course of many, many songs and albums. A better way to go about it would be to highlight the repeat offenders and list their songs.

Scott Stap definitely belongs there... almost every Creed song is laden with a fake and generic spirituality that made them a Christia-rock cross over. Dream Theater, a band that I'm really fond of as you well know, is capable of some remarkably awful (and sometimes whiney) lyrics. For every "Don't Stand so Close to Me" there's a "Synchonicity," and Peart's hit-to-miss ratio is incredibly high, says I.

Oo, random thought. There should be a Terminator Musical, with music by Rush and lyrics by Peart. In fact, there's already quite a few Rush songs you could use in it! Better yet, construct the plot of a Terminator Musical around pre-existing Rush songs. I'm a genius!

I like some of these guys

Apparently Blender is releasing a list of the worst lyricists of all time. Wonder where Elton ranks?

Guess I missed it,

but the UN denied Taiwan's membership. The China/Taiwan debate is one I've just started learning about and it is fascinating to hear different perspectives from both Chinese and Taiwanese people.

On baseball, I wish I liked it enough to say semi-intelligent things about it. But I don't, so I'll just let Eric and Bert go to town. I'll just stick to snarky comments and Casey Blakes obvious awesomeness.

MLB TBS commentators

All I know is that Tony Gwynn got really fat. Really fat.

End communication.

Baseball question

This is a really ticky-tack question, but it bugged me the whole time I was mowing lawn today. Based on what I know from watching MLB on TV, starting pitchers who have the day off sit in the dugout, while relievers sit in the bullpen. Now, pitchers who are normally starters get called to relieve in rare circumstances, such as game 7 of the Series. My question is where those guys sit during the game. If they're in the dugout, they'd have to run across the field to get to the bullpen to warm up. But they wouldn't already be in the bullpen, unless the manager anticipated them being used, right? Is there a secret tunnel connecting the bullpen with the dugout/locker room?

What we've all been waiting for....

Here ya go....I have a boner. From this.

Tribe, GRE, and more

1. I love how that scrotum pustule on TBS (not Brenley, not Gwynn...the other guy) couldn't stop drooling over the Yankees (i.e., gleefully saying the Yankees were sending the "winning run" to the plate in the eighth inning!).

2. Borowski scares the hell out of me, but what can we do? Rafael "Right" and Rafael "Left" are needed to set up, and Lewis ain't a closer. As unimpressed as I am that Borowski "...let the league in saves!" (I don't have the numbers, but I wonder where he ranked in blown saves), I guess you gotta dance with who brung ya.

3. Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner on the GRE thing, Sifo. (Nick?) The thing I remember being most annoyed by were the Old English translations ("According to the passage, which of the following best describes Breorthgrath's feelings about Thraefthrar's theft of Aethergrog's wooden mace?"). I hope you did well.

4. Um. I don't have any more, I guess.

Re: Game 2

Um...Seeing as how they have Leonidas playing 3rd, I don't see how you could be concerned. Whoever gets the ball will play like a man and die like a Spartan!

Wait....his wife's named Gorgo? What the hell...and she's played by Headly Lamar?

Did you miss game 2?

One thought, or question actually. Should Borowski get the ball in a close game in the ninth?

Go Tribe!

Congrats to the Indians for making it this far. Still, none of the games were as exciting as the thursday night rout. And Casey Blake still looks very manly with his beard. Predictions/thoughts?

Hooray!

Drinking a couple of beers a day may be good for your memory!

Sifo is...

... a font of wisdom and counsel.

Fear you not the Doomheralds' Herald of Doom, yet?

Oh, and I'm taking the GRE LIT on Saturday morning. Any tips, Eric?

Just checking....

Who is Sifo? I'm an idiot....

Bonds

John, I'm entirely opposite from you on this. If I had my way, he would be banned from baseball and his stats entirely wiped from any record books. Despite the lack of a conviction, there is a preponderance of evidence that approaches OJ levels that Bonds was involved with performance enhancing drugs. Yes, much of this is Selig's fault for being slow to act and then acting impotently when he did.

You used to argue (maybe you still believe this, I dunno) that using such drugs would not actually help a baseball player hit a ball, only allow them to hit it farther. But new studies and personal accounts from players, not to mention the rise in Bonds' overall batting average during a time when most players fall off, contradict this view. The reaction time, the speed with which a player can turn on a ball, in addition to overall power, are all improved by these drugs.

And it scores you no points to argue that Ruth was an alcoholic womanizer and Ty Cobb a dick--none of these things has a direct impact on the game as it is played. The game changes and none of the external conditions are ever the same. This isn't science. But Bonds has been allowed to persist in his pursuit of the game's most cherished record in spite of the evidence surrounding his use of substances to achieve precisely that goal. Frankly, I wish that more people would have stood up to him, ala Curt Schilling. I wish that as he approached the record pitchers would have refused to pitch to him. He is a shameful disgrace, and his presence in baseball diminishes the game each time he plays.

As much as I think A-Rod is a douche, I'm rooting for him to surpass Bonds and take the all time home run leader record.

(And for the record, I do think that it is a vicious double standard that Bonds bears the brunt of all the steroid talk and Roger Clemens gets none, despite the fact that he is also huge and experienced is huge improvement in his stats in the later years [starting with his time as a Blue Jay], when most pitchers are falling off.)